Movie Review – Bombay Velvet

This is a detailed review of the movie. If you plan on watching the movie, this might be a spoiler 🙂

I am just back from watching the universally declared flop “Bombay Velvet”, but let me tell you it Is hardly that! The movie stars Ranbir Kapoor, Anushka Sharma, Karan Johar, Kay Kay menon and a slew of other famed actors. Mind it, actors. Not stars. And that’s where the difference lies, like in all Anurag Kashyap movies. I am a huge fan of AK’s style of movie making and you might say I am biased. And you might as well be true. But there is just something about his movies that makes me go WOW. Every.Single.Time. 



His canvas is huge. His art, abstract. Not everyone can understand or love a Picaaso. Now, can we? He is, just that. Brilliant at what he does. I just LOVE his narrative. The way he uses his actors. What he gets out of them. The plot is invincible. The star cast enviable. The music, hummable, likeable and something that adds a lot of drama to the movies. In places, it takes the story forward. Sometimes becomes the narrative.

Ranbir Kapoor plays a street fighter who has grown up as a small time goon. He hopes to make it big. He has played his part to perfection. Every scene just makes Johnny Balraj (Ranbir’s character) grow more on you. His madness is his perfection. The ironies in his character make him loveable. He is a merciless goon on one side, and a hopeless romeo on the other. He falls in love with panache, you cry when his heart breaks and you smile when he gets his act together.

I don’t like Anushka Sharma a lot, but trust AK to bring out the best from his actors. She doesn’t have too many dialogues in the movie. She emotes. And pretty well, at that. I wouldn’t say this was the best performance, but probably her best till date!

And what can I say about Karan Johar? He is a show stealer. My god! Can he act? Or can he? He is bloody brilliant, pretty much like AK’s vision. You can totally paint Kaizaad Khambata’s character through him – sophisticated, mean, and merciless and a manipulator to the T. I still can’t get over the images of the ever-affable, always breaking into a giggle Karan Johar to portray this mean and complex character perfectly. I think I enjoyed his character the most, partly because I couldn’t believe what a brilliant actor he is! I totally loved the scene where Johnny goes to Khambata and asks for his hissa. And during the course of conversation, he wants to break into a giggle but doesn’t want to show his vulnerable side to Johnny. The way he switches from being mean, red eyed to giggly and that red eyed merciless expression again, is a stealer.

And like always, trust AK to treat you to a lot if style with his imagination as a director. There is violence in the movie, but he makes it indispensable. He makes it stylish. There is this scene during the climax where Johnny breaks into the Bombay Velvet club holding two machine guns, one in each hand. And the way that scene unfolds in slow motion, the machine guns sounding “dhoom, dhoom, dhoom”, I just wanted to stand up and applaud this genius of a man. What brilliance and creativity. I think I can always go on and on about how Anurag Kashyap is the one of the most intelligent film makers who have such an inherent style of story telling. His brilliance shows in each scene. I also like the fact that he likes to do away with dialogues in many places and just let the acting and emotions take the story forward. He doesn’t tell you the story. He paints a picture and let your imagination and perspective to take over. One day, this man will walk the echelons of the film industry and gain the cult status of the likes of Guru Dutt or an Amitabh Bacchan.

The only point I thought where the film could have better is if it were a little crisp. But then again, AK’s style of narration is expansive, and the back story that he builds so huge that it might have been a bad idea to cut it short. We might have just lost the plot altogether. 

Also, Kay Kay Menon’s role was miniscule and I felt he was thoroughly wasted. He is one actor who totally demands more screen time.

Altogether, a thumbs up for the movie from me.

My rating 4/5

*picture sourced from Google

The AIB Roast’s Roast !

I smiled, I laughed, then I guffawed, then I went Hawww…and then I rolled some more with laughter. Before the AIB roast video had been released on YouTube, AIB had released a small trailer video to advertise that the real thing would be screened on YouTube on the 28th of the month. I eagerly waited for the day, put the little one to sleep and watched the entire thing in a go. A week later, mayhem of sorts has ensued on my FB timeline. Apparently, I have come to know I am no sanskari Indian girl !

Apart from the fact that every second guys out there, and mind you, all you sophisticated holding-white-collar jobs too, leer at girls on the road, calling out the choicest ma-behen ki gaalis and can go on to say “it’s all in fun, yaar”! But when actually somebody does it for fun, you have a problem?

There must be some reason why our national capital is called the Rape capital. I wish you could first do something about that too. Infact, wait a minute! Don’t even DO something yet. The next time there is a rape case, I will applaud you only if you
a) Don’t blame the girl
b) Don’t blame her clothes/time of day or night/choice of friends she was hanging out with
c) Don’t cover up for the accused saying “ladkon se galti ho jaati h”

There. I said it. Too un-sanskari,eh?

I completely understand when people say that we are hypocrites because we detest ma-behen ki gaalis but enjoy them when the Bollywood celebs used them on the Roast. First thing, they didn’t use it on any of us. There were two consenting adults there who knew they would be subjected to this and they agreed. There was an audience who again were consenting (I say this because they each paid 4K for the show).

Secondly, if you have a problem with the whole gaali business, irrespective of who it was used on, take this. The Roast was released on YouTube, not screened on National TV on prime time where your minor children could have watched it. You had an option to not watch it. Even if you did click on the link, it categorically mentioned that if “you are one of those who get offended, you should leave right now!” So you had to be consenting too to subject yourself to that humor. I think it is pretty much like the Porn site business. Everybody knows it’s out there. There is discretion attached to watch those videos. Those who fancy the stuff, watch it. For those who don’t, don’t.

But no, you can sit in the Parliament and watch porn, but if somebody decides to have some fun by calling each other BC MC, you call it a porn show and threaten action. I also heard there were racist remarks (they called AIB member Ashish Shakya black) on the show. So, Even though you call the North East people immigrants, you call them chinki and you racially discriminate against them, you are SO not racist. You are sanskari Indians. You’d rather do everything chupke-chupke, deny that porn or BC-MC exists, but will happily be a jerk or jerk off to anything that resembles a female anatomy. And yet, when Raghu Ram mentions a part of female anatomy in Hindi, you collectively go hawwwwwwwww.

Pretty much like the kindergarteners going “Shame shame puppy shame…”.

I can only say “Grow up!”

PS: A huge thumbs up to Karan Johar, Ranveer Singh, Arjun Kapoor for daring to take this up. To have the balls to be up there, and have every shred of dignity and that celebrated cloak of stardom shredded. And a special mention of the girls Deepika Padukone, Sonakshi Sinha and Alia Bhatt who got roasted just being in the audience and were very sporty about it all. What these guys did is what we need to do exactly – lighten up and laugh at our own selves for our eccentricities. 

Koffee and Karan….a heady concotion….!!!!!!

Well…to start with, I just love the show “Koffee with Karan”, aired on Star Plus every Sunday 9P.M. For the people who watch only the likes of “Friends” and “How I Met your Mother”…well…you might snicker at the concept of ‘just another celebrity talk show’ and be snobbish enough to say that we have nothing edible (food for thought :-)) on Indian television… in that case, you just might want to watch the show to avoid putting your foot in the mouth later.

Bollywood’s ace film director Karan Johar dons many hats. Apart from being a director, he has his own production house,  hosts his own show as well as various other programs like award shows, beauty peagents and  even turns designer for his friends on special occasions.I am not really his hugest fan in terms of the cinema he makes, but he definitely has a way with words. The man is very articulate and witty.

But I like him the best in his own show. The kind of camaradarie that he shares with all his guests is unmatched. Though the concept is that of just-another-celebrity-interview-show, it is anything but THAT. The ambience is that of a bunch of old friends meeting after quite some time and having a chat over a cuppa and gleefully talking about past, present, future, unabashedly gossiping about common friends and lots of leg pulling. I have been fiercely following the show ever since it debuted on the small screen and have been hooked on to it since that first episode wich featured Karan’s best friends in tinseltown – SRK and Kajol. The chemistry that the trio have – they can blow life into the dead. There’s something very believable about Karan that compels people to just be themselves and say what they really think. I have watched all episodes of all the seasons and …..the re-runs as well. Ya…I am that crazy.

PS: Karan Johar doesn’t drink coffee in real life..!!!!!