We love to chat! Why not WeChat?

We Indians love our chats and chaats with equal fervor. We like our gossips to be as spicy and tangy as the golgappe waala’s teekhe waala paani. So what if your motto in life is just “live and let live”? The neighbor waali Mrs. Sharma doesn’t think so. To check what time you reach home at night, what clothes you wear and how many guy friends you have is all her prerogative too. After all, who’s going to take care of the declining ethos of the society, eh?

And so, when I was given the opportunity to be able to connect with any 5 people of my choice, I decided to run a few ticks in my check list. After all, I would be talking/chatting/video calling some of my real favorite people in the world. I decide to send WeChat invites to my favorite 5 people and this is the bhelpuri of a conversation that we had (recreated as honestly as possible ;-))

(Phone beeps)
Apparently THE ShahRukh Khan has accepted my invite and sends me a hello…

SRK: Hello there, young lady!
Moi: H..h..h…h..h hello Sir. It’s such an honour to be chatting with you.
SRK: ha ha ha. Call me SRK. Naam to suna hi hoga

(And I imagine my first true love going all SRKish, opening his arms just for me )

Mrs. Sharma: Hello Sir, I also feel the honour ji. Thank you beta for inviting me into this conversation too.

Moi: No trouble Aunty. (we need someone for entertainment,no?)

SRK: Ghata, you have such a beautiful name. Bollywood has romanticized your name so much. Never thought I would meet someone with the name.

Moi : (blushing) Thanks SRK. I can’t believe you are flirting with me 😉

Mrs. Sharma : (obviously not liking the lack of attention on her): SRK, I heard you are planning another baby. What’s with you and Aamir and Sanju wanting to be dads at 50?

SRK: ha ha ha…pyaar, shaadi aur bacche karne ki koi umar nahi hoti…lekin ye tum kya jaano Mrs. Sharma….ha ha ha!!

(Moi silently enjoying the saucy convo)

phone beeps
(The famous Margaret Mitchell has accepted my invitation too)

MM: Hello there, lady!
Moi: Hello Ma’m. I can’t believe what I am chatting with you right now. I never thought this was possible.
MM : Thank you Ghata!
Mrs. Sharma: But beta, tell me, who is this firangi girl you are talking to?
Moi: Aunty, she’s the author of a bestselling author “Gone with the Wind”. It’s my favorite book. When I first read it, I wanted to kiss the hands and the mind that created it.
MM : Thank you dear. You are very kind.
Mrs. Sharma (obviously not very impressed) : ok, your english books vooks. What do I know? She wrote a tragic love story?
Moi: No aunty, she wrote about how a girl discovered what true love actually meant in between wars and adversities.
Mrs. Sharma : (unimpressed) Ok Ok! Whatever that means..
SRK: MM, Loved your book. By the way, I am SRK. Naam to suna hi hoga….ha ha ha…
MM : Thank you Sir. Pray forgive me for I have never heard of you.
SRK : !!!
Moi : 😛

phone beeps


(Sarah jessica parker has accepted my invitation too)
I let out a whoop of joy!

Moi : Hi Sarah! So excited to be talking to you.
SJP : Thanks honey.
Mrs. Sharma : now who is she? Why couldn’t you invite Anandi from Balika vadhu? Always talking to these foreign girls!!
Moi : Aunty, she is a famous Hollywood actress. She played Carrie Bradshaw in the famous TV series Sex and the City.
mrs. Sharma: What? Sex and what? Your generation and all this talk about s** before marriage and all?

Aunty  goes off on another tangent and talks about our unmoral-ness while …

Moi: So, Sarah, how does it feel to be still remembered as Carrie? Was it difficult playing the part?
SJP: It feels great to be still known as Carrie. People loved the show. Playing the part wasn’t so difficult because it is a little like all the New York girls drifting in and out of relationships.
Moi: But what about being in an affair with Mr. Big knowing that he was married?
SJP: Well, that was Carrie Bradshaw for you and not Sarah. 🙂

Aunty is still mumbling about sex and extra marital affairs…

Moi: You sensationalized the stilettos and high street fashion.
SJP: Thanks a lot girl. I loved being on the show as much as you loved watching it.

phone beeps and Mr. Arvind Kejriwal is on the chat


Moi: hello Sir, an honour to be talking to you.
Mrs. Sharma : Hello Arvind ji. Only you can save the country now. You are doing a great job.
AK: Thank you ladies. But the aam aadmi party needs your support both morally and financially to succeed.
Moi: Absolutely Sir. We will support as much as we can. I am a huge fan. The way you left your high profile cushioned job for the sake of the country is really exemplary.
AK: Thank you. It’s just something I had to do.
Moi: But I am sure it was not easy. Family pressures must have held you back.
AK: Let’s not go there. What’s important is that the youth wants a change and we are trying to bring it. We just need your support.
Mrs. Sharma: Arvind ji, please lead us. We will follow you. Perhaps, after this chat, you could come over to our area to check our heightening electricity bills.
Moi: !!!!!!!

And finally, Sir Ravindra Jadeja decides to accept my invite and join the conversation


Moi: Sir Jadeja, what a performance you have been giving in the Champions Trophy.
SRK: O look, sir Ravindra Jadeja! sir, bahut naam suna hai aapka….its lovely meeting you.
MM: So, you are the Sir Ravindra Jadeja everyone’s been talking about? You must be doing something right! Congratulations..
SJP: O yeah, I heard a lot about you from the Indian media, facebook and twitter. Going great guns dude. Keep it up!
AK : Sir, saare politicians aapki tarah perform karne lage, to everyone can live in peace
Mrs. Sharma: He must be a cricketer. Everyone seems to know him? Was he also involved in match fixing?
Moi: No aunty. But yes, he is a cricketer and is in great form. So Sir RJ, how does it feel to be appreciated by legends all over the world?
Sir RJ : (blushing) well, you know…its nice. I like it. But I just try to play my game. Bowl straight. field well.. Rest all follows.
Moi: I am sure Sir RJ. But don’t you feel offended people make jokes on you?

Sir RJ:I try to keep away from them.People do what they are good at. I try do my act well.

Moi: Looking forward to a great performance from you in the upcoming matches as well.

Sir RJ : I will try my best … (honest smile) 🙂

Mrs. Sharma and I had such an awesome time talking to these great personalities!!All thanks to WeChat for launching this awesome application especially in our country where gossips spread faster than wildfires. If you want to know more about this app(downloadable on your phone), you can read my review here. And if you had fun reading about this saucy, tangy and spicy conversation, you should give WeChat a try too!

This post has been written for the WeChat with Anyone, Anywhere! on Indiblogger




Being a Woman…

I had done the Being a Man post long ago. And had thought about doing this post soon after. But somehow, it didn’t happen. Majorly for the reason that women are too versatile to be taken up completely under a single post. And so I never got around to it. But off late, there have been so many things happening around, things that I have gone through myself, things that my friends are going through and it doesn’t make any sense. Or is it only me? And opposed to the funny Man, this Woman is pretty serious.

There are a couple of female friends who have apparently turned a “marriageable age” according to the parents. The girls believe otherwise. They are pretty happy with their single status and no-responsibilities-for-a-while life. Quite visibly, the parents and daughter have a difference of opinion here. But what completely evades my sane mind is why the parents choose to convince the daughter of their own opinion in an almost abhorring way. And no, I am not talking about some remote village in Haryana or Rajasthan, but about parents who always instilled confidence in their daughters that they were no less than a boy, had every right to good education and were brought up to be smart, confident and financially independent girls. And suddenly, these parents wonder about the fate of their girls if they weren’t married at a ripe age. What would the society say? They purposefully make her believe that she is indeed a burden on their shoulders until she goes off to her marital home. WHY????? I am not even trying to take any sides here, because 18+ years is a valid age in our country to get married and who am I to question it. But why are the girls always shoved onto someone else as a responsibility when they can clearly be on their own very comfortably? Isn’t there a better way to make them understand the point of getting married at an age their parents deem fit? Or do the girls have no choice at all? She can do everything like a boy, and still be a responsibility? I wonder how a stranger is ever going to treat your daughter as an equal when you so visibly don’t.

Another couple of friends have that someone special in their lives, but are finding it difficult to convince their parents of the same. Now again, I wouldn’t want to start the Arranged marriage v/s Love marriage debate, as different things work for different people. But what I clearly find distasteful is the way parents want to stick to the conventional way of Arranged marriages, wherein they are made to act like the ladkiwaala whose sole job is to appease the ladkewaale’s demands. The girls of our generation have been brought up with a mindset of boy-girl equality and no dowry policy. How do the parents even think that these girls can go on and live peacefully with such guys and their parents? Even if the girl doesn’t want to get married to such a moron to defend her parents’ honor, she is not allowed to do so. After all, appeasing the groom’s family is the norm…isn’t it? We are confused. If the norm of killing the girl child at birth wasn’t followed, then surely this doesn’t need to be followed too..isn’t it? What’s the point of making her aware of her choices and then denying them? Wasn’t she better off not knowing them? Isn’t ignorance really a bliss? Are you really that desperate to get your girl off your back that you are ready to pay any amount of money and goodies to a complete stranger to make way for her into their homes and lives?

I feel sorry for women who have been relegated to such behavior, spanning generations and across centuries. But I feel worst when I see parents doing it to their love-you-till-death “ghar ki izzat” daughters, who themselves are well read and in tune with the times. I know we have come far from those days when the girls were not allowed to study nor do anything of their own free will. But at that time, at least the people had some logic behind their behavior. They didn’t let the girls out of the house, the girls obviously didn’t know the kind of opportunities that existed for them outside the four walls of the house and were content with the house work. But it’s really worrying to see parents who have let their daughters let go so far and suddenly want to go all traditional when it comes to marriage and even expect the daughters to do a complete U-turn from their beliefs hitherto, and conform to the whims and fancies of a stranger and his family.

It would be an understatement if I said a woman’s life was tough. It was perhaps my naivety that I thought that girls were meted out an equal treatment in today’s world. Have you ever imagined what a girl would feel like when she is made to believe that she is only a responsibility on her parents? And when she does get married, she is always the outsider in the husband’s family. Is there nobody she can actually call her own? Somebody who will lover her for her person and not just doll her up so that it would be easy to get rid of her, the burden that she is? Will this regressive behavior meted out to girls ever go away? For no reason do they say, “Charity begins at home”. Perhaps some “new-age” parents do need to learn from the age old adage.

More than anger, I feel extremely frustrated and saddened. And lonely. 

And perhaps, that’s the reason why some people feel sad at the birth of a daughter. Because they understand that apart from fighting the demons of female infanticide, eve teasing, molestation and her physical vulnerabilities, she will also have to face the trauma of always being a burden on either her family or her husband, and still feel like she belongs to none in the world.

Quoting a few lines from one of my favorite books “Gone with the Wind” that aptly sum up what I feel about a woman’s life:

“Her life was not easy, nor was it happy, but she did not expect life to be easy, and, if it was not happy, that was a woman’s lot. It was a man’s world, and she accepted it as such. The man owned the property, and the woman managed it. The man took the credit for the management, and the woman praised his cleverness. The man roared like a bull when a splinter was in his finger, and the woman muffled the moans of childbirth, lest she disturb him. Men were rough of speech and often drunk. Women ignored the lapses of speech and put the drunkards to bed without bitter words. Men were rude and outspoken, women were always kind, gracious and forgiving.”