A child in a mother’s womb gets it’s nutrition from the umbilical cord. When the child is born, the umbilical cord is cut. And from that moment onward, the child, only moments old in this new world, has to do a lot of hard work. (S)he has to learn to suck milk out of the mother to survive. Breathe on their own. Pee. Potty. Seemingly innocuous things for us, but huge tasks for these little beings.
But some people, even as they grow up, can’t seem to let go of their umbilical cords. It’s like their umbilical cords have never been cut. Running to mommy or daddy for every little thing is the way of life for them. I wonder, if infants, as young as days old have to start taking ownership of their life, how come some grown ups refuse to do so?
I have also seen mothers having a very hypocritical attitude towards this phenomenon. The daughter with undying loyalty is fine, but the son-in-law with the same attitude is looked down upon. Similarly, the mother-in-law is absolutely fine controlling the life of her son and daughter-in-law, but if the daughter-in-law seeks her parents’ permission, she isn’t a part of the family.
Also, I find, there is a lot of gender bias when it comes to being tied to the apron strings. Guys with their invisible umbilical cords are often referred to as “Mamma’s boys”, but girls doing the same are just “mumma’s pets” or “daddy’s darlings”. Girls with their umbilical cords are considered as very loyal and loving. However the same attitude from a guy is seen as a weakness.
I have seen many parents encourage this kind of childrens’ attitude because I guess they think it shows the child’s respect for them. I beg to differ. A child can be as or even more respectful to you despite the fact that he/she may not come running to you for every problem or asking or taking your advice. Or agreeing with you on every point made, In fact, I know of so many people who use this as a kind of excuse for not standing up for the right thing. I don’t think parental respect has any meaning if you continue to do wrong elsewhere. Have you cut your umbilical?